Saturday, May 9, 2015

The Revelation It is Done.


   In May 1989, I delivered a child into the world, wiping away the blood from her body with my tears. I would be fortunate six years later to have another safely arrive.

  In August 1997, I began to write of the role of a father in the lives of their children after divorce, and of how now no person should interfere with that. I did not know at the time, I would be asked to stand on every word I had written.

  In February 2005, I left two children in care to seek out a new role as a functional father. I never gave up my children, I never excused myself, and I maintained the pressence I could.

 In November 2012, I last spoke to both children, amid hostility in their household.

  On November 29, 2014, I posted Christmas cards to both of my children. On May 9, 2015, it came back marked "return to sender, no longer at this address."

  Our lives now exist on eight photographs, and within several hundred pages of a diary.

  I now understand when my father once told me, that he moved away "because it was easier that way". I now understand why the father of the girls mother moved away and never made contact - not because it was easier, but because he understood that if he remained, what poison would be inflected.

  My role, as their father, has been severed. It is, over.

  And now I make all things new.
  He also said to me "Write this, because these words are true, and can be trusted."
  And he said, "It Is Done."
      - Revelations 21 5-6.