The Door Is Open To My Children

 

 

 

    A first fan recently asked "how will your children know they can contact you?"

    A valid question. Estrained from me for years, they have been told information without opportunity for rebuttal, or correction. My hope is that they have better judgement than their mother.

    Before we were married thei rmother and I were walking on a beach and a couple passed us in the other direction. It was her Father whom she had not seen for years. After preliminary conversation She was compelled to find out more, to discover if the stories that She was told by her Mother were true. When She reached out to her Father, then validated the versions, it was apparent that Her Mother had lied to her about her Father, for Her entire life.

    Unable to live with the truth that She had been lied to all her life - by her Mother - she cut off all future contact with her Father.

    History is not here for us to like but exists to teach us. To not recognise or consider that there might have been an alternative explanation, is to doom yourself to replicate history.

    I should have recognized that moment.

    I did not.

    Today, I have no ide where my children are, who they are, or if they are alive.

    Should they find their way here, the answer is yes, your Father will have conversations with you if you reach out, for of the two of us, I am the only one who has left the door open for you to find me.

February 29

 

 

Every four years, this date rolls around. A leaping year of activity.

I am some what fond of this date. A buddy of mine has a birthday, a couple I like have their anniversay, and a lady whom I once thought a lot of has a birthday - I think she would be 68 this year. We're finally clear of Christmas holidays and well into the working  year.

A month ago I was in Australia and bar one day, even with Covid, it was pleasant. That one day - my last day, unpleasant for me not for what happened, but for what did not happened. One again, I probably let at least one person down.

That residue has carried over for the last 30 days and I am unable to shake the feeling that I have lost some footing. Again. Opportunity lost and who knows when they will want me to return to Australia again. 

The Voices of Australia

 

         After a five year absence I have returned to Australia, via the most oblique route I could orchestrate. I had other reasons for part of the journey which on the first night was not a success, from my chair. I should have been...better.

    The birds this morning were the cockatoos and the rainbow lorikeets. In California, all the birds are motley brown and have no voice. Here, each have their own unique voice, much like the people of Australia. Not surprising, I am having trouble with the Australian accent this trip that I've not had before.

    I hear the words but do not comprehend the message.

    I'm having to ask for the verbiage to be repeated second and third times.

    I no longer speak the language of my home.

    I am not even sure that there is a fit for me, here, anymore.